Author: Blue Gold
Pairings: Elrond/Glorfindel, Elrond/Celebrian, Haldir/Melpomean , Celebrian/OMC
Summary: Melpomean is the first to show more than indifference to Erestor. But After a lifetime of such treatment can Erestor change the elf he was made into.
Disclaimer: I *sniff* do not any of the characters in this story. They are owned by Tolkien/Jackson
Warnings: AU, Angst, child abuse,
“I just don’t see it,” Glorfindel said to Elrond as they watched Erestor speak to Melpomaen his assistant. The Chief Advisor was as he always was, stern commanding and not showing a hint of emotion on his pale face.
“I have it on good authority that it is in fact so.”
“But he’s so cold and stiff, and Mel is so shy and jumpy. Look he’s not even looking Erestor in the eye,” Glorfindel pointed out.
Elrond watched as Erestor dolled out instructions to the younger elf. Melpomaen nodded and wrote notes quickly as the Chief Advisor continued to speak. As he searched for the tiniest form of affection he had to wonder if Glorfindel wasn’t right.
There were no light smiles, no teasing touches, not even an adoring glance from Melpomaen. There were no symbols of affection to be shown from the supposed couple and it made Elrond feel cold as he unconsciously leaned into the arms of his lover.
“You know Fin I have to agree with you, if they are together I feel sorry for them. There is no passion in those two.” Elrond said drawing his lover deeper into the racks of books on the library’s third level.
Glorfindel grinned and shoved Elrond against the wall as he savagely kissed his lord and lover as if to prove there was passion in their relationship. Not that Elrond needed a reminder the dull ache of his backside proved that well enough.
Elrond moaned when Glorfindel began to nibble on his neck and neither realized as voices approached them. It was not until the cold voice of Erestor drew him out of his lust filled haze that he realized they were not alone.
“Must you do that in the library?” Erestor asked in the same dead tone he always used. Only experience had Elrond know Erestor was annoyed at his inner sanctum being disrupted for something as banal as lust.
“Must you walk about with a stick up your arse?” Glorfindel snarled back as he pulled away from Elrond noticing Mel standing behind Erestor for the first time.
“I do not need you knocking over books and giving me extra work yet again,” Erestor said and Glorfindel growled at the smaller elf. “I did not realize barking was considered speaking.”
Elrond decided to diffuse the situation before it led to blows. “Excuse us Erestor we were just leaving,” Elrond said tugging on Glorfindel’s arm and pulling him towards the door.
“My lord Elrond,” Erestor said with a nod before turning off and beginning to speak about some catalogues to be done of books in this section of the library.
“Mel,” Glorfindel called from the door way and Elrond noted how Erestor stiffened. “I hear rumors that you have given your heart to that black haired harpy in there and I must say you can do much better. If you want to give your heart to something cold and unfeeling there are some statues in the garden, at least it is in their nature to not respond and they are much more beautiful.”
“Glorfindel! Really!” Elrond said pulling his lover into his office. “Do you not think that was too much?”
“It is not as if Erestor is an elf with feelings,” Glorfindel snapped.
“And how can you be so sure?”
“Elrond please, he sounds like he is reciting the laundry list when he speaks, he doesn’t smile he doesn’t frown he doesn’t feel anything!”
Mel looked at Erestor and his heart broke as his friend let out a tiny sigh before shrugging off Glorfindel’s comments and picking up where he had left off with Mel.
That night at dinner Mel continuously glanced at the head table but more importantly the vacant seat that belonged to Erestor. Finally not caring what Erestor would say about being proper he stood making his apologies and made his way to his friend’s room.
Opening the door he wished he was surprised to see Erestor sitting in the darkened room something shining in the moonlight in his hand. Moving quickly he snatched the knife out of Erestor’s hand bringing the elf out of his daze.
“Erestor you missed dinner.”
“Oh, I think I will go to bed,” Erestor said quietly his tone dull and flat. Mel nodded helping the elf out of his formal robes and tucking the sheet around his bare form. Mel sighed Erestor was much too thin to be missing meals.
He watched the eyes go vacant before walking out of the room. Shutting the door behind him he turned to stare at the door a moment and shut his eyes as tears fell. Turning away from the door he moved blindly and bumped into a solid form.
Looking up his was absorbed into a pair of calm blue eyes. Glorfindel’s brow narrowed when he saw Mel’s tears and the direction he had just come from. “That stupid little cow,” he growled marching to Erestor’s door and tossing it open.
“Lord Glorfindel what are you doing?”
“Something that needs to be done,” he snapped marching to Erestor’s bed. “Wake up!” He snarled.
“No, stop,” Mel cried trying to pull the blond into the hall. Glorfindel shook the scribe off as Erestor stirred sitting up.
“Why are you in my room?”
“I am here to tell you you are a waste of an elf. You are a waste of perfectly good space and we would all be better off with you gone! You are heartless, cruel and unfeeling and give all elves a bad name.”
“Can you leave now?” Erestor asked quietly.
“That’s all you have to say for yourself? You have nothing else to say?”
“Close the door when you do I feel a chill.” Glorfindel threw his hands up in the air and slammed the door on Erestor as he walked out. The dazed elf simply lay down and stared blankly at his ceiling.
Mel followed quickly after the blond in a rage. “Why did you do that?!” He yelled and Glorfindel was startled.
“I am tired of watching him trounce on other people’s emotions as if they don’t matter.”
“What in all of Arda are you babbling about?”
“He was the one who distressed you was he not.”
“What kind of lover is that…to show no affection as if he is ashamed of you then bring you to tears behind closed doors.”
“Glorfindel one Erestor is not my lover, Haldir is. Erestor is my friend, why are you like that to him? Do you think he has no emotions? No heart? I watch everyday as his heart is stomped on by you and everyone else and he simply accepts it as if he deserves it. I’m telling you now! Leave Erestor alone!” Mel said and marched towards his rooms.
The next day was a rare day free of Duty for Glorfindel and he immediately went to see his lover and sighed to see him buried under a stack of correspondence. “Erestor!” Elrond called with a sigh.
“Yes my lord?”
“Could you take care of this?” He asked pointing to the desk and Erestor nodded as Elrond stood and approached his lover at the door. “Its much too lovely a day to stay inside don’t you think?” He asked leading the blond away. Glorfindel caught one more look of Erestor settling down at the desk to get to work.
It was nearly midday before Glorfindel returned to the house, Elrond having deserted him to go ridding with the twins and Celebrian and he had declined to give the family some personal time. Glorfindel didn’t know why but he was drawn back to Elrond’s office. Hearing voices he paused at the door Erestor’s dull tone easy to make out as well as Mel’s breathless one.
“I’m sorry, Lindir asked me to hear his new song and I lost track of time. It is really Lovely outside.”
“I suppose it is, I have finished Elrond’s duties for the day, so I must get started on my own. Do not forget the new catalogue Mel.”
“But you must have lunch Erestor.”
“Is it midday already?”
“Yes Erestor,” Mel said and Glorfindel wondered about the sadness in his voice.
“I am not hungry, I have work to do.”
“Erestor you must eat, let us go to the kitchens it will take but a few moments.”
“If you insist,” Glorfindel quickly made his way down to the kitchens and found quite a few elves gathering picnics to make their way out. Glorfindel smiled at the elves and went about getting his own lunch.
The silence more than anything announced when Erestor and Mel arrived. Followed by the whispers.
“Do you actually think he is going outside?”
“In daylight? He would burst into flames.”
“Mel!” Lindir exclaimed entering the kitchen. “Just the elf I was looking for, Tamril suggested we make it a duet and I want to hear your opinion. I won’t take no for an answer.”
Mel glanced at Erestor who simply said. “You still have to do the catalogues.”
“I will have plenty of time,” Mel said and Lindir nodded casting a glare in Erestor’s direction before leaving with the brown haired scribe. Glorfindel shook his head and watched as Erestor took an apple and took a bite out of it. The lack of a crunching sound and the slight brown tinge had him know it was over ripe and he watched in disgust as Erestor finished off the apple.
Looking at the other elves he was surprised to see them laughing and outright pointing at Erestor who left the kitchen without a word. Following after the elf he wondered if had left because he was upset. Erestor walked to his office shutting the door behind him. And after a few minutes of listening to quill on parchment he decided to make his way elsewhere.
Shutting his diary he pushed it aside and began to work realizing he was quite behind. It was long past dinner when a sheepish Mel entered the room. “You will need that list to complete the catalogue,” was all Erestor said and Mel sighed. The list was his work as well and he felt guilty for keeping Erestor cooped up in his office.
“You missed dinner,” he said as he looked at the list.
“I had to do the work of three people. There was no time,” Erestor said blandly and Mel wondered if the elf could even get upset.
“I’m sorry…I just…”
“Do not concern yourself, I think I will go to bed now, everything is starting to look the same.”
“Why don’t we go for a walk?” Mel asked hopefully as Glorfindel’s hand paused at the door.
“It is a beautiful night. A nice walk would be fun,” Mel tried again as Erestor arranged his papers.
“Enjoy your walk,” he said opening the door. “Yes Glorfindel?”
“The expenses for the Armory renovations,” he said holding out the papers to Erestor.
“Put them on the desk I will look them over in the morning,” Erestor said sweeping past the blond, a dark shadow gliding through the corridor.
Mel sighed and taking a quill from Erestor’s desk walked out as well. “Where are you going?”
“I should get some work done seeing as how Erestor did the work of three people today.”
“His own, mine and lord Elrond’s, its no wonder he’s tired. I just wish I could do something to break his routine.” Glorfindel nodded and approached the desk looking for a place to put his report among the clutter. Carefully clearing a space he found some a single book on the table. Curious at what was obviously a journal he opened it to a page.
I do not understand what I did this time but everyone seemed upset in the council when I did not let the elf leave because his wife was bearing his child. I simply needed him to answer a few more questions then he could go. I suppose someday I may do something right. I look over all these entries and yet I still don’t know what it is. Well I still understand I must be punished … Glorfindel was stunned when a hand snatched to book out of his hand. He looked up at Erestor and the gray eyes were as bland as ever.
“That is private,” he said looking about the office before walking out.
Punished? Glorfindel wondered what Erestor could have meant and wondered if he would ever get another chance to see the diary again. He had brought Erestor to Arda and had been his guardian in name mostly. It had been hard to be kind to such an unaffectionate child.
Though he could not help but feel guilt for the way Erestor’s childhood had been such a series of misfortunes from the moment they had arrived in Imladris. But he had never been able to feel more than slight indifference towards the child as his most positive feeling.
“But Olorin, what do I do with him?”
“Gandalf now, and he is a child treat him like you would do any other child,” Gandalf said as the child tugged on the end of his beard. “This is Imladris the new home of the both of you.” Gandalf said pulling his horse to a halt. “And this is where I leave you,” Gandalf said moving the child to Glorfindel’s horse.
The tiny hands stroked his face and Glorfindel laughed. “No little one I do not have a beard, what do I call you?” The child shrugged. “What is your name?”
“I don’t know,” he said running the horse’s mane through his fingers.
“What did your nana and ada call you?”
“What are those?” He asked and Glorfindel groaned. Looking up he realized Gandalf was gone and in all this time he hadn’t thought to ask him any questions about the child that had been riding silently in front of him all this time.
“When some one asked you to come to them what did they say?”
“The one with the beard said pen…pen…”
“That’s not it. Anyone else?”
“The one that’s there when my eyes close says a lot of stuff. Monster, evil, beast, scum…um…”
Glorfindel’s eyes widened. “No no, we’ll choose a name for you.”
“Okay, what?” He asked shifting dangerously on the horse, so Glorfindel put his arms around the child.
“I’m sure we can find a book of names once we meet Elrond.”
“He is lord here, I will be offering him my services.”
“Oh okay,” her said. “What’s service?”
“I will help him. Look there are some children over there why don’t you go play I will come back for you after I talk to Elrond. There is no need for you to be bored.”
The child stared at him for a moment then wandered off towards the children. It was an hour before Glorfindel returned for the child to find him cowering in the shade.
“What are you doing under there? Come on let’s go meet Elrond.”
Looking back on it now Glorfindel realized he had never even asked Erestor what had had him hiding like that. Or the subsequent cowering every day thereafter. And then the teacher. Shaking his head before he went down that awful road he went into the hall of fire to enjoy music and singing. Forgetting Erestor for the moment.
“That was much too close.”
“Yes but he is distracted, I forget at times how big his heart can be.”
“He has had too many years of peace. Why does that little one persist?”
“He feels as they all do, but feels it is wrong, I can sense his hidden relief each time he is free of his presence. You know what is coming.”
“I know and it is not fair. She is pure, he should suffer in her place.”
They were joined by a third figure face masked in a tight scowl. “And he will.”‘