Never Never Land pt3

Title: Never Never Land 3/?
Author: Blue Gold
Rating: R
Parings: Spike/Xander, Clark/Lex, Dick/Bruce, Ares/Joxer, Cupid/Strife, etc…
Fandoms: Multi Centered in Buffyverse w/ support from Ultimate Spiderman, DC, Smallville, Xena/Hercules, Ultimate X-Men and a few surprises along the way,
Summary: Xander wakes in a strange place where superhero’s and gods are real, and they all have been captured. For what and by whom has yet to be discovered.
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything.
Author’s Note: For the crossover challenge that can be found here

Lex looked up as Clark entered into his study. “Hello Clark.”

“Lex I want to know what you were up to at Summerholt.” Lex stared at Clark for a long moment and frowned. Reaching into his desk drawer he had his handgun in his hand before he looked back at the farm boy,

“You want to know what?” Lex asked slowly releasing the safety as he spoke. “Did you acquire some new jewelry while you were gone?”

“Don’t avoid the subject Lex. I want the truth, if you are even capable of that.”

Lex sighed as he stood. A week ago this scene would have frustrated him to no end. But now it simply angered him. Tired of the charade he leveled the gun at Clark’s chest. When the boy back a step hands raised eyes wide with fear Lex’s expression hardened.

“Who are you?” Lex snarled.

“Lex, I’m Clark.”

“Are you,” Lex pulled the triggered and the bullet hit ‘Clark;’ in the shoulder, What began to gush from the wounds wouldn’t be considered blood by anyone with eyes. “What the hell?” Lex exclaimed as the creature began to melt, his thoughts of a shape shifter gone now.

Before Lex could explore the puddle that was staining his floor he was awash in a shimmer of light and standing in what looked like a shop of some kind surrounded by a group of people that looked strangely familiar.

Before he could truly get his bearings he was disarmed by a bleached blond amazing cheek bones. That instantly had him thinking of Clark and what that thing in his office had been.

“There will be more arrivals so no, you will not be getting any answers just yet Alexander,” the oldest form of Hecate stated as she resumed her scanning of dimensions through her crossroads.

The darkness shrouded the streets but the noise easily made its way out of the alley though all it did for anyone who dared to be out in that part of town at that time of night was tell them which street to avoid.

Batman was watching from above the alleyway confused. Robin was acting as if these men were a real challenge. Reaching the only conclusion he could he entered the fray just in time to see one of the criminals punch Robin in the nose the crack resounding through the alleyway as the boy wonder stumbled backwards.

Batman made short work of the thugs and rounded them up hanging them from the fire escape and sending a call to the police to round them up before rounding on Robin who had something in his hand he was attempting to shove into his mouth,

Batman quickly grabbed it and didn’t see what he had expected. Where he had expected drugs of some kind he instead found a live frog squirming in his gloved grip.

“What is this?” Batman snarled as Robin gasped attempting to get the frog. “Who are you?” He suddenly growled slamming Robin into the wall. “Where’s Robin?” Batman growled again wondering how long this switch had been in place. This had been the first night in close to almost two weeks they had seen each other as either Bruce Wanye and Dick Grayson or as Batman and Robin.

Even as he questioned Robin the frog held safely in his hand he could feel something off about the body beneath him as it seemed to lose its consistency. Batman was stunned as the Robin double apparently dissolved in his hands. Quickly capping off a sample he barely glanced at the strung up thieves as he made his way out of the alley and disappearing in a flash further instilling his reputation as something inhuman.

Appearing in the magic shop, he took in his surroundings in seconds sidestepped Spike and was face to face with a very startled Lex.

“Luthor! Where’s Robin? I know this is your doing!”

Lex not intimidated by the least but the character standing before him smirked. “I’ve noticed this habit of everyone blaming me. It’s rather unnecessary. And what exactly are you supposed to be?” He asked taking in Batman’s getup.

“He’s bloody Batman, dark and broody much too like the Poof for my tastes. I prefer the Joker.”

“The Joker is creepy now Catwoman is cool,” Dawn stated, “Though Robin is just hot.”

“Lex Luthor and Batman? Why are we getting guys from comic books? How is that going to help us find Xander?” Dawn asked.

“Pet, trust me, don’t question gods, makes them a bit testy,” Spike said casually.

“Sage advise, keep it in mind,” Hecate said as two more flashes appeared in the room and two leather clad forms looked around. One covered head to toe in leather and metal, his pale fingers moving wildly across his outfit. As the other tan and built took a quick survey of the room.

At this point Dawn looked as if she would explode from excitement at Spike’s side. Even Buffy and Willow were grinning as the new arrivals.

“We seem to have a problem,” Giles said emerging from the back room where he had been seeing if he could get anything out of the Xander double. “That false Xander has just melted.”

“Meltled?” Spike snarled pushing Giles out of the way and slamming his fist into the wall of the Magic Box when all he saw was some slimly residue and the bindings he had used to tie the thing up.

“Hecate,” Ares growled at the godess.

“Oh Ares hush, you and Strife just sit still I have a few more roads to check then we can have a nice lovely talk.”

“Ares? Bloody god of war?”

“What’s it to you little bacchus?” Strife asked.

“And who the bleeding hell are you?”

“Demos? Phobos?” Giles guessed.

“Those losers?” Strife snarled insulted.

“Well, it is clear you are not Eris. And those are the only gods ever mentioned in the company of Ares regularly.”

“Duh Giles, he’s Strife,” Buffy cut in.

“Strife? God of strife? But that is part of Eris….”

“No, no, Strife, Discord’s his mom, he’s the god of Mischief. Could you do it?” Dawn added trying to get a better view from behind Spike who had placed her there the second Ares had been identified.

“Do what?” He asked appearing at the girl’s side. Dawn blushed even as Spike again placed himself bodily between the two. Mumbling from the duster Strife smirked.

“I can’t hear ya’ always got this guy bellowing in my ear made me a little deaf.”

Dawn giggled as Ares growled forming a small fireball tossing it at his nephew just as someone appeared in the path, Not one to take well to being attacked he responded as was his way. Two fists into Ares’ chest startling the war god. He looked down at the shorter man and frowned. It wasn’t until Ares grabbed his wrists and took a few steps back that they saw the claws that had been imbedded in the war god’s chest.

“That almost hurt,” Ares said snarling lobbing the new arrival through a wall. A roar was his only response as his attacker came flying forwards, a large gash on his forehead healing even as he attempted to slice a few new choice holes in Ares when he stopped in midair.

Glancing back he saw a redhead with a hand up muttering words as Hecate pulled herself back into one form.

“Now then,” she said forming a large round table and having everyone take a seat. Ares and Wolverine glaring daggers at each other. “You all have something in common. All of you had a creature similar to the one that once sat in that room replace someone in your life. You are also the most equipped to help find the lost party wherever they are.”

“Now who did you lose Ares?”


“The Mighty?” Willow and Buffy asked but at Ares’ glare fell silent.





“Colossus?” Dawn asked,

“No, he’s not a mutant. You wouldn’t know him,” Logan stated eyeing the girl who reminded him of Kitty.

“Peter? I know this, marvel…wait Peter Parker? Spiderman?”

“How do you know that?”

“Same way I know he’s Bruce Wayne,” Dawn said pointing to Batman. “Xander lends me his comics.”

“Bruce?” Lex asked startled. “Bruce Wayne? Why are you in that idiotic get up? Last I heard from you, you were heading for the Far East, that was six months ago, I haven’t gotten a measly postcard since.”

“Why would I correspond with you?”

“Why would you…” Lex looked at him vaguely insulted before his expression frosted.

“Boys, boys, before this goes any farther. You should know, Bruce dear, the Lex Luthor you know is not sitting before you. The man you know as Lex Luthor would be Lionel Luthor to this Lex.”

“What does my father have to do with this?” Lex asked weary.

“You are from parallel realities in the one this Bruce is from you made your money after burning your parents alive in a tenement fire and claiming the insurance money.”

“But …”

“I know in your universe your father is the one that did that. Now who did you lose Bruce?”


“Lex Dear?”


“Kent? Superman? And you care?” Dawn chimed in.

Lex looked at the teen startled. “Superman? Why wouldn’t I care? Clark and I are best friends.”

“Now you are a little more than that dear,” Hecate said and Lex looked a little bashful as he glanced down.

“I believe you. The Lex Luthor I know would want Clark Kent dead and couldn’t even begin to fake that expression.”

“Oh thank you bat boy, it does my heart well to know that you believe me.”

“Hecate why are we here?”

“Always so impatient Ares, as I stated before you all lost someone very important to you. Lovers I might add and they were all replaced by the same thing. That is how I found you all. Alone you would never be able to find your loves. Together that is a different story; you all will need to work together.”

Dawn raised her hand. “At least someone has some manners. Yes dear?”

“But why are they all fake? I mean Batman and Lex Luthor? Ares and Strife, they are from a tv show? Wolverine? He’s an X-man, I know demons, and gods and stuff are real but mutants? Superheros? Supervillians?” Glancing at Lex she adjusted. “Well almost Supervillians.”

“There is a simple answer to that. As you know there are an infinite number of universes.”

“Yeah like the mulitiverse in DC. Infinite Crisis and all that,” Dawn said with a face.

“Not quite, many universes exist, that does not mean you exist in them all or that your existence is the same. For example you are real here; there is a universe where you are all actors. There is another where you never came into existence and there is yet another where everything is as it is here short of the relationship between Spike and Xander.”

“Artist can create universes or tap into one’s that are already there. Tolkien is a creator, as are Stan Lee, J.J. Abrams and Neil Gamien, to list a few you would recognize. So is the lady in red, a complete unknown who hides all her writing under her bed, and won’t even sign it with her own name. Other’s tap into universes that are already there creating off shoots of the universe or giving the inhabitants vivid and odd dreams.”

“Infinite possibility,” Giles said amazed.

“Let us not even begin on life altering decisions, just believe Newton was so right it is amazing that a mortal could even begin to comprehend it.”

“Hecate,” Ares snarled.

“Joxer is still a mortal isn’t he?” Hecate asked softly.

“Of course he’s mortal. What else would he be?”

“Most often the god of peace. Some feel you need to calm.”

“I am calm.” Strife snorted and Ares glared at him.
“And then he’s there are times when he’s the god of Mayhem.”

“Now that makes more sense,” Strife said thinking of Joxer and his constant power buzz from the would be warrior.

“But where are they?” Buffy asks. “I mean if you can bring their boyfriends here why not just bring them?”

“Because whoever took them is a god in their own right. It makes finding the trail more difficult. There are many roads to search. So until something happens…”

“Like what?” Lex asked already impatient.

“They capture another, or the ones already captured do something that vibrates along the crossroads. Wherever they are they do not belong but if they are not interacting with the universe they are in.”

“They are not there,” Bruce and Lex said in unison. Glancing at the other billionaire he frowned.

“Can you please do something about the cape and cowl? It’s hard to take you seriously.”

“I am not here to make your life easier Luthor, I am here to find Dick.”

Logan stood and began pacing a cigar appearing in his mouth as he felt around for a lighter. A pale hand extended to him and he snatched Spike’s lighter. A growl was the closest Spike got to thanks,

Spike who had been silently watching all this, never one to draw attention to himself when trying to assess a situation had to smirk. Batman and the bloody Wolverine Xander would love this, Frowning at the reason this was happening he looked towards the self proclaimed goddess and watched as her three forms reappeared, A haze of blue light appeared as he assumed she resumed the search.

Eyeing the one member of the new merry band he was interested in he looked at Strife. “Mischief eh?”

The young god arched a brow, then let forth a cackle that had Giles spill his tea down the front of his shirt and Buffy reach for the nearest weapon, It was Dawn’s squeal that calmed everyone down.

“You did it! Do it again.”

Strife laughed at her enthusiasm though it was a more normal laugh and winked at the young girl feeling her penchant for mischief with glee. But the blond now there was some mayhem potential once he got his Cupid back.

“So um, what do we do now?” Buffy asked as Willow nodded.

“I suppose we wait. See what we can learn from each other’s experiences with these false plants and see what we can learn,” Giles stated.

“I agree,” was heard from Bruce, Lex, and Ares. Spike, Strife and Logan all wishing they could get to the part where they hit something.

“Hey slayer, you still store that box of the poof’s clothes here?”

“Why Spike? Finally gonna change your shirt?” Buffy snapped.

“No, I bloody well don’t want to look at Batman all night, and he seems just as tall and wide as the broody knight.”

Batman shook his head removing the cape, cowl and gauntlets, completely ignoring Lex’s smirk. “I have a sample of the clone and a frog that they were trying to ingest, from my observations it seems it was necessary to maintain the form once they had been injured.”

“Let me see the sample, I can take it to the lab on campus and have it analyzed,” Willow said holding out her hand. “The frog too, I can see if it is a unique species.”

Willow gasped as she was handed a small box, “Oh it’s still alive,” She said startled as she slipped the small box into her bag. Pulling a small empty jar from the display she gathered some of the once Xander goo from the other room.

She also gathered some herbs to do some magical testing of her own. They needed to find out as much as they could about this bad guy and why they had taken her Xander.

“Will, I’ll come with you,” Buffy said, sure she would be of little use to the four men already sharing information and she was not about to let another one of her friends out of her sight.

“Do be careful. We don’t know what that creature wants.”

“They’ll be fine watcher.”

“Spike…” Giles began

“Haven’t you noticed that it’s a boys only club? And I hope the slayer can handle any regular night baddies, or should she just die again so we can get another replacement?” Spike snapped.

“I’ll come,” Wolverine growled. “I want to kill something,” he snarled.

Buffy and Willow exchanged a look and decided the blue jeans wife beater and plaid were normal enough.

“Just don’t go all grr on any humans,” Buffy warned.

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