Never Never Land pt5

Title: Never Never Land 5/?
Author: Blue Gold
Rating: R
Parings: Spike/Xander, Clark/Lex, Dick/Bruce, Ares/Joxer, Cupid/Strife, etc…
Fandoms: Multi Centered in Buffyverse w/ support from Ultimate Spiderman, DC, Smallville, Xena/Hercules, Ultimate X-Men and a few surprises along the way,
Summary: Xander wakes in a strange place where superhero’s and gods are real, and they all have been captured. For what and by whom has yet to be discovered.
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything.
Author’s Note: For the crossover challenge that can be found here

Logan shifted around the Chemistry lab impatiently as Willow performed some tests on the two substances. Writing notes into a little pad she had pulled out of her bag. Watching the red head Logan smiled the lab coat she had placed on reminding him of Jean.

Willow glanced up and smiled slightly at the mutant and gasped as she looked through the microscope.

“What is it Wills?” Buffy asked from her perch at the other end of the lab table.

“It’s held together by a combination of Frog DNA and a sample of whoever they are copying. But it’s not a perfect formula. Even with the magic traces it degrades normally within three weeks. The Frog shares the same DNA pattern and eating it can help it stabilize the body when it needs to heal. I also think it may help slow the degrading process to keep the creature alive up to six months,” Willow added after doing some quick calculations.

“You said there was part magic?” Logan intoned trying to understand the smell that had told him whoever that was it wasn’t Peter. It had been completely unnatural.

“Yes but it doesn’t seem involved in keeping the pieces together. It was there for something else” Willow said with a frown,

Buffy started as her cell phone rang and she realized it was a text message. “Dawn says come back.”

Packing up carefully Willow was ready to go in moments. They made it back to the magic shop surprising incident free, But Willow got the feeling that whatever vampires felt when they saw Buffy was increased about ten times. She could have sworn she saw glowing yellow eyes and before she could even decide on a spell they had retreated rapidly. She would have to ask Spike about it when they got back.

Entering the magic shop all plans of questions went out the window. Standing in the middle of the shop was the strangest person she had seen since this all began. Looking him over she thought he looked familiar but couldn’t place him.

“Who’s the monk?” Buffy asked of the man dressed in brown robes complete with a hood. He held a large bound book that was shackled to his wrist.

“I am Destiny of the Endless.”

“Oh!” Willow said suddenly remembering coming across mentions of them in relation to the Kindly Ones.

“Those you seek have invaded my garden. Which is to be expected all roads lead to my garden. They are leaving even as we speak.”

“Then why the bloody hell are you here mate?”

“The pages are unraveling, the book is coming apart. If this is not stopped at the source there will be no book.”

“There are plenty of bleeding books.”

“This is the book. All is in here. The result is not in here, roads are fading. When the book fades Destiny ends. My…” Destiny frowned and the others watched as he looked up some just then noticing his blind eyes. “Family calls, destroy the source or it will all unravel.”

Destiny vanished and Buffy gaped at the spot. “What in Hades was that?” Strife asked.

“It sure as hell wasn’t bleeding Bastian with his bloody Never-ending Story.”

“If only, that was bad news very bad news my dear,” Hecate said. “It means finding the boys its step one.”


Xander slowed to a stop when the giant statues began to loom before him. He was in the middle of the road and there were giant statues lining either side of it. Most of them were disturbing in some way or another.

One with its hands covering his face, one with his back to all the other statues and one that was fat and naked and bothered Xander just by looking at it, shaking himself he looked at the others glad that the howling was in the distance and it didn’t seem to be gaining.

“Can we just back right out of here?” Xander whispered and the ground began to shake. Most of the others came to a screeching halt when the tremors started keeping them from running into Xander’s back. When one of the statues one of a young girl began to turn towards Xander and seem to be smiling he backed up in fear.

“The road?” Clark asked with a wary look.

“Its looking better and better,” Xander replied and they all backed out of the garden more quickly when the statue seemed to step towards them.

It seemed seconds before they were back on the road and the statues could not even be seen in the distance. Xander was about to ask Clark if he had sped them away but all the others were keeping up pace with them as well.

They stopped to regroup all wondering where they could go. Their decision was taken away when glowing eyes appeared all around them and snarling could be herd.

The group was quickly backed into a circle around each other and Dick looked towards Xander you wouldn’t happen to have a spell for this one would you?”

“Shh, I’m trying to think of a happy memory,” Xander grinned suddenly trying to ignore the tingle in his groin at the memory.

“Expecto Patronus!” There was a blinding flash of light and before Xander stood a very solid but silver pack of Hyenas. Not even bothering to be disturbed by the fact, his protection was a pack of hyenas he watched as they created a first line of defense around the group.

Hecate’s eyes opened wide as she sensed the pure surge of chaos on the crossroads and vanished in a glow of purple. The hyenas were snarling as something ran through the mist that seemed to have appeared on either side of the road towards them before they were all engulfed in a purple light and appeared in the Magic Box.

“Blinking at the sudden artificial light Xander broke out into a grin when he heard Spike’s voice.

“Get these bleeding dogs off me!” He exclaimed and Xander was amazed to see his patronuses…patroni…pa…hyenas licking the vampire. Though they were losing their consistency, he could already see through three of the six.

“They’ll fade in a bit Spike,” Xander said and was stunned to see how quickly he was enveloped into the vampire’s arms. Hyenas yipping happily at their feet.

Around the room similar reunions were taking place, though some were more raunchy then others. Especially Strife, who seemed to believe to make sure Cupid was real he had to get a hand on every part of him, including in his kilt.

“Strife…oh…really…we….” Cupid gave up any pretense of speaking and rational thought as he let the mischief god have his way.

“Strife!” Hecate’s sharp tone actually had him stop for a moment and Clark spoke up.

“Hey who are you?” He asked looking at the spot where they had just arrived and a brunette with black robes was standing looking clearly out of place starring at everyone with calculating grey eyes.

“Snape?” Xander guessed.

“Snape? What is a Snape?”

“I guess not, you must have been running from those things in the woods too. What’s your name?” Xander asked.


“Ok, where are you from?”


“Where is that?” Xander asked as the name tugged at the corners of his memory.

“Middle Earth?” Erestor asked now the one confused as he pushed his hair back away from his face and revealed the point to his ears.

“He’s an elf!” Dawn exclaimed moving away from Buffy and Willow. “Do you know Legolas?”

“Legolas?” Erestor repeated catching the last word.

“Pet, what language are you speaking?”

“English, what else Spike?”

“Pet I speak 42 human and demon languages that wasn’t one of them.”

“It was elvish,” Dawn said with a sigh sliding up to Erestor.

“I don’t know what you are talking about Spike.”

“Xander,” Willow asked looking at the boy who was attached to Spike’s side.

“Yeah, Wills?”

“Why is there a glowing ball of light over your head?”

“Oh its still there? I thought it would be gone by now. Two words, Harry Potter.”

“Children! Children!” Hecate shouted irritated with thunder claps for emphasis and it was then Xander and some others realized she had been trying to get their attention for quite some time.

“One Xander my dear were you planning on telling me?” Hecate asked.

“Telling you what?” He asked confused and all the gods turned to stare at Xander in shock. No mortal should be able to understand what she just said.

“Oh dear. Seems there us much more going on then I originally anticipated even with the visit from Destiny. Xander my dear are you drawn to the strange and fantastic?”

“Uh hell mouth? Vampire boyfriend?”

“Do you seem to survive things you should not? Drawn to strange magics?”

“Uh Hell Mouth? Slayer? Witch? Werewolves? Mummy Girl? Hyenas? Harry Potter? Superman over there? Should I go on?”

“Xander, you are a Chaos being, or chaos incarnate. Either way you have unlimited untapped power. You could destroy the universe with a thought.”

Xander swallowed.

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